Eat Happy in 2018 by Rebecca Storch.
If dieting was a job – what would be the skills you’d gain at it?
Counting, punishing, control, guilt tripper extraordinaire. Etc.
If losing weight was the project, which you’d completed; then what do you do with your awesome skills?
If it was a job, I’m guessing you’d set up a new project so you can do it all over again. I mean, why waste those brilliant skills?
If you lose weight, and you do so in a less than positive manner, then all you’ve gotten good at doing is – being mean to yourself!
From my own experience, what tends to happen next is the weight goes back on again. Strangely comforting. Now you can bring out those well practised attitudes again! Yay! And we all sing the counting song;
“Count the syns, count the fat and off we go again!”
So you want to be slim – but you also want to be happy. Then the bottom line is, you’ll need to find a way to eat that is not gut-wrenchingly horrible. And this isn’t about the food –this is about HOW you eat. How you eat is how you live and it’s how you’ll be from this day forwards.
I’m going to paint you a picture now;
You stop eating not because you think you should, but because you really are content with what you’ve just eaten. You go around your business, and as you walk along, the tape that’s playing in your head is positive. You like yourself, you feel warm when you think about yourself, and let’s just cut the c**p, you just bloody like yourself, alright? Heck, you more than like yourself, goddamn it, you love who you are! You’re always there for you, you back your good self-up when you’re down, and you want the best things for you!
You eat cake if you want it, but have such a god-damn awesome relationship with yourself, that you trust that there is always cake in the world and it’s there for you to take whenever you damn well please. You take a break when you need it, in ways that make you feel good the next day and don’t deplete you over the week. Instead of pretending you aren’t finding things tough, you ask for help, because you trust that you won’t be laughed at, but hey – a bit of laughter at yourself isn’t that horrible anymore, because you’re just so well adjusted and content.
Let’s get practical!
Here are 3 things to look at right now that are making you potentially slim but potentially unhappy:
- You talk negatively to yourself.
- You eat according to external rules.
- You narrowly focus on eating.
And, here are the 3 ways to get you potentially slim, and definitely happy:
- Your self-talk is kind.
- You eat according to the feedback you get from your body and not feedback from family, society, diet books or according to any old rules and messages you got from your people.
- You start to think about what’s important to you, and you focus on them. Your family, spending time in nature, volunteering your time when you have it.
I’m talking affirmations. Grin and bear it my friend, because it’s not all incense and chakras. Words are powerful. Whatever you are saying to yourself now isn’t true, yet you are believing it, and you could argue that you are just hypnotizing yourself to think shitty thoughts about who you are. So why not just stop it?
“I accept myself”
“I am good enough”
“I trust there is always more when I want it”
“I can eat whatever I want”
“I trust myself completely”.
Cheesy? But god, it’s worth a shot. This is exactly what I did. I hated it to start with. But I used to walk to the bus stop every morning to work, and with each step I took, I said some nice things to myself.
The second step is to eat according to how you feel in your body. Sometimes you moan and whine that you just ate a huge plate of chips, and you think “that was so stupid” but if you actually just stopped and felt what your body was saying to you, maybe you’d realize that actually you feel okay! Great, no guilt needed.
And thirdly, you get into your values a bit more. Because what can happen with dieting is that everything else is on pause whilst you concentrate on the diet and the rules and the planning, and only when it’s finished do you start your life again. Well, life is now. Tomorrow is no guarantee and you are god damn lucky to be able to live today and experience everything that today holds. Please, don’t stop your life in order to lose weight. Live your life, I beg of you.
This stuff is so big and so anti-diet that it can get really confusing. This is why I do what I do, because there needs to be time and lots of steps to get to eating happy. Please get in touch if you are interested in finding out more.
I wish you all the best in your one wild life.
Don’t diet. Just live!
By Rebecca Storch
Rebecca created Eat Happy / Bwyta Hapus to help people feel much happier with their eating! Having experienced disordered eating she now blogs, runs workshops and talks to share what she learned to help others to stop dieting and finally, eat happy! A stepmother to two little ones with many years of experience working with children of all ages.